14/3/11

14/3/11

I’ve lost my drive -
my weak feet
are on the pedals
but the engine
is not running.

I pump and pump,
I’ve slept and slept,
Trying to renew,
Trying to refresh
the drive I not so long ago had,
But I can’t find it,
And I can’t weep
because I refuse to be that weak.

I pump and pump
until my feet blister,
Trying to fight,
Trying to hear whispers
of the drive I not so long ago had,
But I can’t see it,
And I can’t weep
because I swear not to be that weak.

Double standards I create
will kill me, that I know,
I am just not sure I care,
The things I have done,
Sure I will reap what I sow,
And all of this, I know,
I am just not sure I care,

I stand, I sit, I sit some more,
I lay down staring at the door,
But I can’t quite mould my hand
to the door that I can no longer understand
So I sit, I sit and I sit some more.

I’ve pumped and pumped,
Hell, I’ve slept and slept,
Trying to renew,
Trying to refresh,
The whole time simply begging

for death.