1-12-09
You know when someone moulds their lips
preparing their words – you see it in their eyes
and you see their tongue – a potential weapon
start to propel and the air winds up and those lips
get ready to tell…

Wait. Stop. Rewind. What the hell did you just say?
I’ll press pause, rewind, play, pause, rewind, play.
I turn the volume up full blast and place my ear
right next to the speaker. Pause, rewind, play,
pause, rewind, play. I press zoom upon your eyes,
Could you really mean those words your lips
just produced?

You know when someone’s thinking of what
to say and you see it in their furrowed brow,
And then it lifts and all the wrinkles fade and
you can see the thinking taking place even in the
shape of their mouth…

Wait. Stop. Rewind. Laugh, you’ve got to be kidding.
Pause, rewind, play, pause, rewind play, my god,
how my ear is killing me. Pause, rewind, play.
Pause, rewind, play, I’ve already memorized every,
every single word you said that hurt me. Could you
really mean them?

You know when someone’s about to push the air
out with their lips and create a lie with their voice
or even the truth can hurt just as much, but you
know that moment you see the air start to move
in front of their face and the sound is creeping…

And you just want to take that piece of air in your hands
and shove it right back down their throat, lean in close and whisper,
“Don’t say a fucking thing, I promise like hell you’ll regret it,
I promise.”

And now, you cannot take it back.
Even if you say you didn’t mean it.
You cannot take it back.
And I cannot glue the skin in place.
And we can’t take anything from the past back.
And how I wish…

And you can’t take anything back.